The boys had the best time, jumping and splashing, submerging their hands into the mud and throwing bits of mud in the air. It was wonderful to watch, they were just so free. Without me telling them to be careful, don’t get wet, stop shouting they played and played and it was great. Once they were finished they both wanted their hands cleaned and lets just say, a baby wipe wasn’t going to cut it. We found a small stream of running water and they jumped right in and cleaned their hands, they thought it was the best.
We travelled by train which was fun for the boys. It didn’t take long for the boys to all be playing together. There were water systems with toy boats, water squirters and little cogs to turn to create currents. It was great. Hannah and I managed to get in snippets of conversations, between me herding my brood, doing trips to the toilet and feeding my hungry bunch. The boys got to operate a robot arm, that played an electric drum kit, I may have had a go too. The boys explored a huge steam engine and got to control what I think was a mini replica of the Mars Rover, unfortunately we didn’t get to go into the planetarium due to my well established poor time keeping. Alexx controlled a really cool robot where you could make it sing/talk etc. It was a great day had by all.
Now from everything I have written here it would be easy to assume, I was well on the way to getting my shit together. Well I am here to say “Do Not Be Fooled”. I have made some baby steps, but I still have a long way to go. However, it is hard, there is so much to focus on. So much to do, so many different things trying to get my time. I don’t know what to do or where to start. Then I add extra stuff on top like writing a blog and running an Instagram account and everyone knows if you want to be successful [whatever that means to you, you have to work on the stats]. I started looking into and adding in these extra dimensions to try and boost my stats and therefore boost my audience reach too. I always feel a bit of an idiot talking about this stuff, but the reality is at the end of the day, I do want people to read what I write. I want encourage and connect with people and me writing and no one reading, isn’t going to make that happen. I started to get sucked in, I also started losing my joy and my passion. I would find myself getting overwhelmed, uninspired and procrastinating and not producing the content I wanted to, because my head was basically too far up my own arse trying to find a magic formula.
Time, waits for no one.
We all know this. We all have exactly the same 24 hours a day as everyone else. Yet, I stand by and feel as though I am sinking beneath the tides of the reality that is my life. I watch others, mainly woman on Instagram who seem to have it all figured out. Women who run a home, work out side of the home, run a blog, look sleek and stylish AND are super Mama’s to boot. I sit and watch their lives unfold on my screen and wonder how. Now this is not a post talking about the perils of social media and how you only get to see selected snapshots of these people’s lives, OK well it is, but not in the way that you think. It all comes down to time.
More than just Flowers.
Zachary can sometimes struggle with his emotions, especially big emotions. I know this is nothing strange when it come to five year old’s. Heaven knows at the grand old age of 32, I do too. I have learnt to ‘read’ Zachary and I have learnt to preempt what many of his ‘triggers’ are. A lot of the challenges Zachary faces due to his Autism are the same as any other child his age, however it tends to be the intensity and frequency that sets him apart. When I collected Zachary from school on Friday he came out with this huge grin, ran up to me and hugged me. He tried to pick me up and he was talking ten to the dozen. I could tell you what was going to happen next, just by those first few seconds.